breathe

There’s times my breathing gets heavy, then it gets faint. I realise i’m having an anxiety attack, caused either through content, existential dread or pure exhaustion.

It’s those times much like now, when I am currently having an anxiety attack that I realise that I do not have someone I can call, message, contact. To help me. To stop this.

I have me, I suppose it’s easier this way, less of a fear of abandonment to add onto my present anxiety.

I just remind myself to constantly breathe, that it’ll pass. The exhaustion will stop one day, the anxiety will alleviate, the dread will pass.

I breathe, I meditate, I close my eyes or just stare into the ceiling, understanding that I am not alone as I go through this, I am with myself, I can look after myself. I just need to remind myself of that.

I’ve been through worse attacks, and made it out. So this one won’t get me, this one will pass.

I hope you do that too if you ever have to.

Just remember you can’t be alone if you look after yourself.
People aren’t always there, they leave. The only constant is what you see in the mirror. It’s you, it’s me.

So just breathe.