I woke up pretty late, but after about a couple months I didn’t wake up with a throbbing pain in my lungs. They feel a little less constricted I suppose, it has only been like 32 hours since my last time, so I’m not here tryna say oof being clean feels good.
Yesterday I managed to not smoke even though I was around it quite a bit. It’s weird how there aren’t supposed to be any physically addictive qualities yet due to the tobacco in each J it’s like I know i’ve been smoking almost half a pack a day for quite sometime. So I’m ready to go through the nicotine withdrawal. To be honest, the kinds of things I’ve had to detox myself from, this doesn’t seem like a really hard endeavour. But much like life, it gets harder at night.
I don’t know my entire body is sore as fuck, after months I took out the time to work out yesterday, and it does feel good at this point. Let’s see what life has in store.
The goal isn’t to go sober forever, but rather find some sort of balance. I’m thinking weekends are okay, cause you know if i’ve done all my work, gotten through the week and successfully completed all I had to, I suppose a little bit/ a lot bit, isn’t a bad thing. Maybe even a nice escape, but i suppose it’s really hard to logically argue for any reason to not be sober.
Hmm, let’s see how today goes. Got a fuckton of work, but for some reason, it all seems doable now, I have so much time, when I’m not just prepping or waiting for the next sesh.
Day 1 went kinda well, had trouble sleeping. But that’ll get better with time.
I can’t wait to go home, I’ll be back soon hopefully. I miss it with so much, this time I won’t restrict myself from going to certain places, I don’t know why I thought it was a good idea. I really should’ve gone to my friends sisters wedding.
A Sane Undertaking 